User talk:Ia Morte/Souls of the Sand

Hai. Nitpicky feedback followeth here. If you can make it work within 1970ish (2000 my arse) characters.

- Would replace "the god of Strength" with "demigod of health" or something.

- Remove "-tier" from the difficulty.

- The quest starts instead of opens.

- Al Kharid has no hyphen. As I said, nitpicky.

- Might review some commas.

- Instead of Undercity, I'd specify Catacombs. It sounds cooler and less copied from Prifddinas.

- Could mention that you also meet some familiar faces, e.g. Maisa, Leela. If possible, mention that the fate of the pharaoh might also be explored.

Other than that, you should ask for Mod Rowley to be the developer. Yes, he's on Myreque, but Stu advised me to always include the preferred developer/curator and they will try to make it work.

If you run out of characters, I'd harshly suggest to remove the thank you to Lime. Yes, he deserves it, but nobody will care reading the proposal. If you plan on making a thread, he should get an honorary mention there.

One more thingy: a chase in Pollnivneach might not work fantastically due to the Amascutian gang and, well, Amascut herself being there. :P

Anyway, looks great and I'd be quite satisfied if this won. Feel free to ignore all of this (except for the Srowley thing :P), and good luck! 19:08, June 6, 2015 (UTC)