Land of the Goblins

Land of the Goblins is the fourth quest in the Dorgeshuun quest series. You must seek out the abandoned former home of the goblins, Yu'biusk, in hopes of helping Zanik.

The Chosen Commander
Head to the Dorgeshuun Mines and you will find Grubfoot, the tiny goblin from Goblin Village. He is trying to gain access to Dorgesh-Kaan to talk to Zanik. However Mistag tells him "surface goblins are not allowed into the city by law. The council made an agreement to let humans from the surface into the city, but there was no such agreement about goblins. The council wants to extend a hand of friendship to surface goblins, but we have heard that they are a very warlike people. Most of the Dorgeshuun think that letting them into the city now would be going too far." Tell Mistag you will take responsibility for him and then go south to enter the city.

Yu'biusk
Take Grubfoot to Zanik. She can be found in Oldak's workshop, in north-west Dorgesh-Kaan. He will say that he had a dream of a distant land named Yu'biusk to which Zanik, who he thinks is the Chosen Commander, must lead them. The Chosen Commander is a goblin who was prophecised by Hopespear to save the goblin race by leading them into Yu'biusk. Grubfoot believes a secret lost temple to the Big High War God located far to the west is the key to this new land; the priests know the way to Yu'biusk.

Grubfoot makes everyone promise not to reveal the location of the secret temple.

Oldak will realise that a cave system is located in that area and will use a sphere to teleport you there. Grubfoot can't go as he must go back to Goblin Village before the generals miss him.

You Not a Goblin!
You will appear in the goblin cave with Zanik. Head north west until you reach the entrance of a temple blocked by two goblin guards. You will find some black mushrooms near the stairs leading into the temple. Pick one or two, and grind the mushroom with an empty vial in your inventory to produce black mushroom ink. You can also kill the goblins in the area if you don't already have a goblin mail.

Talk to the guards and they will allow Zanik to pass, but not you, since you are not a goblin. You will have to find another way to enter. Head back to Oldak and explain your dilemma. He will tell you that you should seek out the aid of the make-over mage as he figures the only way to get past the guards is to become a goblin.

Head to the make-over mage south west of Falador. The mage will explain that you will need to make a goblin transmogrification potion out of toadflax and pharmakos berries. The mage will provide the berries, so it may be a good idea to gather a spare in case you miss any steps later on.

Once you have made the potion, unequip everything and head back to the goblin cave - near the south-eastern fence of the Fishing Guild. If you brought 2 law runes and 1 molten glass, you can talk to Oldak to teleport there.

Transmogrification
Head back to the guards and drink your potion. They will now let you pass, recognising you as one of their kin; you can choose your very own goblin name and avatar at this point. The guards will try to guess your name. If you like it, tell them that they guessed right, or else to guess again.

While transformed into a goblin, the goblins in the cave will be aggressive regardless of your combat level. If you are hit by any of them, you will turn back into a human, wasting a dose of your potion. So it is recommended not to drink the potion until you are directly next to the stairs.

You can not enter the temple while having a follower (Pet, summoning familiar, etc.).

You will now be inside the temple. Talk to the High Priest on the north and you will learn that Zanik has been thrown in the Huzamogaarb tribe jail for causing a ruckus. To gain access, dye your goblin mail with the black mushroom ink. Equip the black mail to disguise yourself as a Huzamogaarb tribe member and you will be allowed past the guard at the north-east part of the temple.

Go to the end of the chamber and talk to Zanik. Ask her how you can rescue her and you will learn that the goblins confiscated her Moving-Over-Distance Sphere (Dorgesh-kaan sphere) and put it in a crate across the room. Simply search the crate and retrieve the sphere. Now give it to Zanik and she will teleport back to Dorgesh-Kaan, reminding you that you are now on your own. Head back to the High Priest and ask about Yu'biusk.

Quiz
The High Priest wants to test your knowledge about the Big High War God before he speaks about Yu'biusk. You must answer his questions with the correct reply to proceed.

True or false: those who do not believe in the Big High War God, whether they are goblins or other races, must die.
 * True.

''Oh? Why?''
 * The Big High War God commands it. ('Not to doubt Big High War God! Doubters must die!' 'Always to slay enemies of Big High War God! Enemies must die!')

True or false: Big High War God chose goblins to be his race because goblins mighty warriors.
 * False.

''Oh? Why you say that?''
 * Goblins were not mighty warriors before he chose us.

True or false: goblin leaders should be good at planning in order to win battles.
 * False.

Why not?
 * That's one of the commandments. ('Not to make own plans. Thinkers must die!')

''Prophecy saw some day Big High War God send Chosen Commander. What Chosen Commander do?''
 * Lead goblins to victory over the whole world.

After you pass the test, the High Priest will answer all questions. He will tell you that a deceased prophet named Snothead knows the way to Yu'biusk. However, he is dead and you can only talk to his spirit in the crypt, an area restricted to ordinary goblins. To gain access to the crypt, you must pickpocket one key each from the priests of the six tribes.

Start by pickpocketing the priest of the black tribe, since your goblin mail is already black. He is located in the cave where Zanik was held.

Whitefish
You need to dye your goblin mail to match each remaining tribe and gain access to their chambers. You will now need to leave the cave to bleach your armour white, and collect the other dyes if you don't already have them.

While in goblin form, you cannot attack or cast spells. To revert back to human form, simply equip any non-goblin item and you will change form, resulting in the goblins throwing you out of the temple.

If you've started Mourning's Ends Part I, you can buy the dyes from the seamstress in the Elven town of Lletya with the exception of white. You will need one each of yellow, blue, orange, and purple dyes.

To enter the tribe wearing the white mail, you need armour which has its original colour bleached, resembling white. Talk to Aggie in Draynor Village and ask if she can make dyes for you, and then about the black and white dyes. She says that you need to catch a raw slimy eel, and use it as bait at the fishing spot in Hemenster.

Go to the Lumbridge swamp dungeon, and bring a light source and some bait. To the south there is a fishing spot, where you can catch slimy eels. If you wish to save time, slimy eels are tradeable and can be bought cheaply at the Grand Exchange. Note that while fishing, you may catch a raw cave eel instead of a slimy eel. These are not the same and cannot be used as bait to catch whitefish.

After you have caught a slimy eel, go to the Fishing Contest spot west of the Ranging Guild. You will be allowed to enter since you have already won the competition before, but only after you have spoken to Aggie about the white dye in order to use the option 'I need to catch a Hemenster whitefish'. Catch a Whitefish and bring it to Aggie with 5 coins. She will now "de-colour" your black goblin mail white.

Take the dyes, the white goblin mail, the key from the black tribe, and some combat gear to the cavern. Unequip everything, and take another sip of your Goblin potion to enter the temple.

Macabre Crypt
Look at the guards of the tribes, and note the colour of their guard; if you cannot clearly see them, examine each guard. Since you've already obtained the key from the black tribe, continue now from the white tribe, then for each of the others apply the corresponding dye to the goblin mail. Together with the key from the black tribe that you obtained earlier, you will have one key from each of the six tribes:


 * {|class="wikitable"

!Tribe Name !Location !Armour Required !Key
 * Huzamogaarb
 * North-east corner
 * Black goblin mail.png goblin mail
 * Huzamogaarb key.pngogaarb key
 * Ekeleshuun
 * East
 * Blue goblin mail.png goblin mail
 * Ekeleshuun key.pngshuun key
 * Narogoshuun
 * South-east corner
 * Orange goblin mail.pnge goblin mail
 * Narogoshuun key.pngoshuun key
 * Horogothgar
 * South-west corner
 * Purple goblin mail.pnge goblin mail
 * Horogothgar key.pngothgar key
 * Saragorgak
 * West
 * White goblin mail.png goblin mail
 * Saragorgak key.pngorgak key
 * Yurkolgokh
 * North-west corner
 * Yellow goblin mail.pngw goblin mail
 * Yurkolgokh key.pnglgokh key
 * }
 * Yurkolgokh
 * North-west corner
 * Yellow goblin mail.pngw goblin mail
 * Yurkolgokh key.pnglgokh key
 * }
 * }



Now you can enter the crypt - the big door in the north. Once inside, prepare for battle by equipping weapons and armour; you will change from goblin to human when you do this. Go to the first grave to the left, and say the name of the prophet. He will come out from the ground and start to attack you (level 28). When you have beaten him, ask him where Yu'biusk is located. He will tell that he does not know, but hints his ancestor might. Ask for the name of his ancestor, and go to the first grave on the right side, and speak that name.

You will be attacked by another priest (level 36). Beat him, and ask him the same questions. Unfortunately, he does not know either, so ask for his ancestor's name. Continue with this zigzag pattern until you have beaten the remaining three prophets (levels 44, 52, 52).

The last priest will summon four level 15 Skoblins, although these can be avoided by using the Protect from Magic prayer. If you kill one of these, he will keep summoning a new one, so just focus on the prophet.

Once you've killed him, speak to him and he will tell you the location of Yu'biusk.

Home Portal


After you have obtained the location of Yu'biusk, try to exit the room: you will be caught and thrown out of the goblin temple. Return to Dorgesh-Kaan, and speak with Zanik. She is with Oldak in his workshop. Tell Zanik and Oldak what you have learned from the priests. Oldak tells you that they have found an oddity - a fairy ring - south of the city. After analysing it, he found out that it contains traces of elements similar to that which are found in 'law' runes. The three of you decide to use the fairy ring to try and open a portal to Yu'biusk.

Make sure you have a light source and go to the fairy ring south of Dorgesh-Kaan. If you prefer, you may leave Dorgesh-Kaan, find the nearest fairy ring and use the code A-J-Q to reach the destination. An alternative way is going there by way next to the Dorgesh-Kaan Agility Course. Now climb down the ladder at the west of the agility course platform, then head south and take the first corridor to the east. At the end of the corridor, head south and look west for the icon.

Meet up with Zanik and Oldak, who will ask you to adjust the machine by allotting power to each ring proportional to the area within the ring. The rings, from outer to inner, have diameters of 6, 4, and 2. The equation for a circle's area is:

$$\text{Area} = \pi \times \left({\text{diameter} \over 2}\right)^2$$

Multiplying the diameter by x increases the area by a factor of x2. Therefore, if the area of the inner ring (diameter 2) is 1, the area of the middle ring (diameter 4) will be $$\Bigg(\frac{4}{2}\Bigg)^2$$, or 4, and the outer ring (diameter 6) will be $$\Bigg(\frac{6}{2}\Bigg)^2$$, or 9. Meaning, the combination for the machine is 9 - 4 - 1.

Activate the machine and you will automatically be teleported to Yu'biusk. Walk north-west until you get to some short walls surrounding a strange box. Oldak will warn you that you need to return fast, but keep walking. Zanik will notice the box and ask you to help her open it. Open the strange box, and Zanik will be sucked into it. As the portal is closing and you have no way to save Zanik yet, rush back to Oldak and return to his workshop.

Rewards

 * 1 Quest Point
 * 3,000 Experience
 * 3,000 Experience
 * 3,000 Experience
 * 3,000 Experience
 * 3,000 Experience
 * 2,000 Experience
 * Access to the Goblin Temple (with an altar to recharge prayer points).
 * Access to Yu'biusk, using fairy rings.
 * Ability to buy moving-over-distance spheres (Plain of Mud Sphere) that transports you to the goblin cave.
 * Ability to make goblin potions.
 * Access to the Bandos gravestone (talk to Blasidar the sculptor in Keldagrim).
 * Ability to access the beacon located near the Goblin Village, west of Ice Mountain.
 * 2 extra spins on the Squeal of Fortune.

Music unlocked

 * Catacombs and Tombs - Catacombs of a Goblin Temple
 * Dusk in Yu'biusk - Yu'biusk
 * Temple of Tribes - Goblin temple
 * Zanik's Theme - Cutscene
 * Dorgeshuun Deep - Fairy ring

Required for completing
Completion of Land of the Goblins is required for the following:
 * The Chosen Commander
 * Hopespear's Will (Goblin High Priest miniquest)
 * Obtaining Inferno Adze

Cultural References

 * If you talk to one of the Goblins in the temple, they will say there's a ghost in the crypt, and the player can respond with "So who you gonna call?" or "I ain't afraid of no ghost!", both a reference to the movie . For the first response, instead of "Ghostbusters!", the goblin replies "Big High War God!".

Trivia

 * On the day of the quest's release, the Game Guide article's spoilers section read: Spoilers are being held in Yu'biusk for one day - come back later. The spoilers in fact became available 4 days after the quest was released.
 * The High Priest reveals that Big High War God's true name is Bandos.
 * The High Priest reveals that long ago, all of goblins were divided into 12 tribes. The Dorgeshuun disappeared, and the other tribes merged. Only 6 have rooms in the temple now.
 * Combat experience is not gained in the crypt; this is probably because the skoblins respawn forever, so a player could easily leave their character in the crypt for a long time and gain massive amounts of experience.
 * When talking to the goblin guards after transforming into a goblin, the guards will try to guess your goblin name which is a random combination of a prefix (Beetle, Bent, Blob, Bone, Dirt, Drip, Earth, Fat, Foul, Frog, Grass, Grub, Lump, Maggot, Moss, Mud, Roach, Slime, Slug, Small, Smelly, Snail, Snow, Snot, Stupid, Thick, Thin, Toad, Ugly, Wart, Wood & Worm) and body part (arms, beard, blood, bones, bottom, brain, brains, chin, ears, eye, eyes, face, feet, finger, fingers, fists, foot, hair, hands, head, knees, knuckles, legs, nails, neck, nose, teeth, thighs, thumb, toes & tongue) for a total of 992 possible names. If you don't like the name you're given, select the guess again option for another name choice. After choosing one name, talk to the guards again to change to different name. A player's goblin name appears in the quest journal.
 * It is possible to have a goblin name similar to the three most recent dead goblin high priests, as well as Wartface, Bentnoze, Grubfoot and Wormbrain, though Bentnoze's name will be spelled with an "s"; Redeyes' and Strongbones' names are unable to be copied.

Land of the Goblins Land of the Goblins