The drunken mariner is an old sailor found in Catherby, who informs the player on the Battle of Lumbridge. He loves battle, describing the battle going on between Saradomin and Zamorak near Lumbridge as "a lot of fun", and his love of battle is apparently what led him and his shipmates to dry land, as he didn't wish to miss the battle between the pair.
His love of the sea is apparently greater than his love of battle however, as soon after arriving, he claims that the sea calls him back, and soon intends to head back to the ocean and to leave the pair to their squabble. Nevertheless, he seems happy to encourage the "landlubbers" to join the battle between the pair, telling them that they are looking for help, and that there are plenty of rewards.
- He uses a variation of the "by the gods" expression, saying that "by the sea gods", he wouldn't want to miss the battle between Saradomin and Zamorak. The existence of these "sea gods" is unconfirmed, as they have not been mentioned elsewhere. Armadyl uses a similar phrase in his Book of the Gods, saying "by the elder gods", the planet he was exploring had life.