This article is about the weird old man. For other old men, see Old man (disambiguation).
Weird Old Man
Weird old man
Release date 7 September 2004 (Update)
Race Human
Members Yes
Quest NPC No
Location(s) Outside the Kalphite Lair
Sells items No
Gender Male
Examine What's he mumbling about?
Weird Old Man location
Weird Old Man chathead

The Weird Old Man is a man gone insane outside the Kalphite Lair. His origins are unknown, but he found the Kalphites and warns adventurers of the dangers he encountered.

If the player has already gone into the Kalphite hive, he will simply say "No thanks, I don't want any" when spoken to.

With the release of the Desert Tasks, after a player has completed all tasks in this area, they can collect 20, 30 or 40 noted potato cacti once per day (20 with Desert amulet 2, 30 for Desert amulet 3 and 40 with Desert amulet 4).

(Worth 642,500, 963,750 or 1,285,000)

The fastest way to get to the Weird Old Man is to use the Fairy Ring network and dial BIQ, then walk north-west.



  • His words "The horror! The horror!" are a reference to Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness.
  • When asking the natural historian in the Varrock museum about kalphites, it is heavily implied that the weird old man's name is Iqbar Ali-Abdula.